The boys radiate with smiles
and the girls,
the girls are all beautiful.
It was a race,
a four year long
relay race.
We switched vehicles, and made pals
in those, who we
happened to ride beside with.
We wished all well,
but looked at them
only from time to time.
Had to have an eye on the road.
It’s tough to make love
while on the move.
The race is over now,
and we all sit on the finish line
lying on our backs,
rubbing our shoulders
stretching our legs
savoring the high
of finishing a hard-run lap.
And we see others around us
sweet summer sweat
oozing everywhere
wiping off the heat,
the dust, the grime of the races
from all the splendid faces
And we realize that that was how they had been
radiant, shining, handsome.
We’ll all run different races now
but as of now, they seem far away.
And as we bask in the sweet glory
of finishing one long, satisfying, fulfilling run
The boys, they radiate with smiles
and the girls,
the girls look just beautiful.
May 5, 2009 at 7:47 am
Splendid!! It cannot be put more beautifully than this!
May 5, 2009 at 9:13 am
Nice poetry and wonderfully written
May 5, 2009 at 2:36 pm
very well written
May 5, 2009 at 6:30 pm
the poem is just like the girls…beautiful
May 5, 2009 at 6:58 pm
kummav mama! you always have something special in your posts, dude!!
May 5, 2009 at 7:26 pm
Awesome !
May 5, 2009 at 10:28 pm
wow…
May 5, 2009 at 10:42 pm
Nicely written. Though I felt it could be more lengthy .. to bring out the lengthy duration of the race ..
May be something of the sort could be added — that although we slowed down sometimes, others encouraged us, or conditions took toll on us … etc. Just a suggestion.
Otherwise, like anyone of your posts, its beautiful.
May 5, 2009 at 10:45 pm
thanx again for coming up wid smthing tht will keep our memories of des days fresh forever…
May 5, 2009 at 11:11 pm
keka…
May 5, 2009 at 11:16 pm
Everyone, thanks you all so much. It was, but a humble effort. I’m honored!
May 6, 2009 at 12:52 am
Awesome dude !!! so lovely and dulcet one… Guys would be feeling so great abt you, abt them, abt the time you all shared in IIIT….. have fun..All d best…n keep writing…i always read ur snippets n like them
May 6, 2009 at 1:18 am
nice work yaar … very well written !
May 6, 2009 at 1:22 am
Amazing !
May 6, 2009 at 10:28 am
Aniket does it again. Yawn
May 6, 2009 at 4:05 pm
It was like watching the “NoteBook”
May 6, 2009 at 11:24 pm
With every next line it keeps getting better…and towards the end ,those words make a perfect ending..
beautifully structured, beautifully written!
May 7, 2009 at 1:06 am
WoW!!!
Nicely written
May 8, 2009 at 8:30 am
Lovely post, some terrific lines in there.
May 8, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Your play with words keeps getting better and better. Especially towards the end, I loved the way the words seem to flow on quite effortlessly on their own creating a beautiful picture. Its a perfect example of practice makes better; and I think I can safely say now that at this pace you will be ready to start making work that is worth publishing very soon. Good Luck!
May 8, 2009 at 5:25 pm
i m all praises for u buddy
May 14, 2009 at 3:53 am
sorry for the late comment!
It took me more than 1 read to appreciate your idea… not because of your writing style though, which always feels fresh and lovely!
I especially liked repetition of first three lines in the end!